I Must Have That Kind of Face...

Today my son discovered that someone, overnight, smashed in the car door window and stole my ipod. Normally, this wouldn't be that traumatic since it will be a simple replacement of the window and not too costly. However, my financial situation is such that tonight I told my 7 year old she couldn't have a quarter for the gum ball machine.

I have to admit, I cried a little. When you are going through not just one situation but multiple situations that seem to never be resolving themselves, it's daunting.  I am blessed, however. I have a loving family and I just happen to be home visiting when this happened. It just seems that monetarily and emotionally I have leaned on them a great deal and it doesn't seem to be ending any time soon. I don't like to continually be reliant on others this way. Plus, I didn't want this to create anxiety in my life.  I had, what I thought was and interview, tonight and I didn't want it to effect my demeanor or confidence.

For the interview, I met with this lovely woman and it turns out the job I thought I was meeting with her about was already filled. However, she and I have been in contact for some time and she wanted to find out what I was interested in doing and to see if she could get my resume circulated. Interestingly, there was more to this meeting than met the eye.

We talked about the school and her job but what we talked about for a better part of an hour was about  life. We talked about her divorce, my divorce, my soon-to-be high school reunion and her past reunion, children, goals, parents, death and the meaning behind when you watch a person pass away and faith.  Yes, I know you are probably are thinking "How do you get to that kind of discussion during a introductory meeting/interview?".  All I can say is I must have that kind of face. It happens a lot. People open up to me about their lives in sometimes the most personal of ways. I have to say, I too, am an open book. Perhaps this is why this so easily happens. I am not afraid of my history and I suppose this shows.

Nobody should be afraid of their history. It's the future that can be frightening. However, it should be perceived as exciting and an adventure verses something to be feared.  I use to be in that place when I was in my 20s and childless. Even so, I always thought I could be much more adventurous than I was.  It was true, there are so many things I should have taken a chance on and done.  Now it is not so easy when you have young children and laws and guidelines that you have to adhere to.  It should be easier but it's harder. I just want my history to be something not only my children are proud of but I am proud of ,as well. I want to live life to the nth degree and have as little regrets as possible. I want my children to know to never be afraid of their past or their future.  Most importantly, to make it their own.

Meeting with this lovely woman, gave me another example that my journey is not only in the big things but the every day meetings and conversations. The value in all the people around you.  I've learned that each of these experiences with others is an equal trade in connection and validation. They all add value and various perspectives to your life and how you can move forward. This is my goal, to move forward, to create a fantastic past and a phenomenal future in the absence of fear.